In the life of an average person there comes a time where we feel like someone is using us; for our money or connections or what not. Even though this happens to most of us and has become quite common in these times being used is never nice. You might be being used by a friend, but being used is generally when you’re giving and they’re getting, and you’re strung along the whole way. So the question we now ask ourselves is what we should do when something like this does come up, the answers might seem easy when seen from an outsider’s perspective but real life is seldom like that.
What we need to understand is that even if it is obvious for us to see if someone is getting used it might not be that easy for them to figure out the same. Even if people do understand they might not want to say that out loud because sometimes saying things aloud makes them real and who really wants to admit that their friends don’t really like them?
I know that most of all I’m saying is sounding like gibberish so I’m going to go ahead and give an example.
On the 1rst of jan I was in a really bad mood because it was the first new years that I was spending all alone on my own. That day my best friend was out of town so I had no one to celebrate with. That evening I got a call from a few friends from saying that they wanted to drop by my place to spend new years. I knew that they were only coming over because the place they originally planned to celebrate in was occupied. I knew they were using me but I let them come by anyways. We spent the evening together and I had great fun. So, the question here is that- was that the right thing to do?
I know it seems like what I did was stupid but I don’t think so. I was sad and depressed all day and because they came I wasn’t depressed anymore. So in a way I used them too didn’t I? They used me for my place and I used them for their time and company.
I am not playing devil’s advocate for the users. All I am trying to tell you is that there are 2 sides to every story. Nothing ever is just black or white, there is always that tiny little grey area there and that makes a lot of difference.
-TheGirlWithaBlackScar
TheGirlWithaBlackScar 
I think my reaction would have been to not let them come. I would prefer to be ‘miserable’ on my own if I knew the ‘friends’ we’re not sincere in wanting my company. But it is a complex situation and I can see why you made your decision. Happy New Year to you!
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I think you did the right thing inviting them over. It didn’t look like “using” to me. It was just an opportunity for people to get together and celebrate. Everyone wins!
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that’s actually a much better way of looking at it!!!!!
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